tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post448725845534387036..comments2023-10-20T04:45:50.849-05:00Comments on O Mighty Crisis: Jocelynhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03227519811818290510noreply@blogger.comBlogger35125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-63516568710749405682008-01-17T03:03:00.000-06:002008-01-17T03:03:00.000-06:00I used to work with a girl with autism who had a t...I used to work with a girl with autism who had a tendency for repetition. As such, my usual round of curses had to be replaced by "dear me" and "heavens". I was the most awkward 22 year old ever.<BR/><BR/>(And, why, yes, Britney and I are a mere two weeks or so apart. The similarities are incredulous, yes?)Princess Pointfulhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10911296163218358167noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-1186156084708937232008-01-16T23:20:00.000-06:002008-01-16T23:20:00.000-06:00Not laughing at you at all...nope, not me.Not laughing at you at all...nope, not me.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-24126345127804505872008-01-16T20:04:00.000-06:002008-01-16T20:04:00.000-06:00Ouch. But, truly Dead Sea Salts are just wonderfu...Ouch. <BR/><BR/>But, truly Dead Sea Salts are just wonderful. Next time try it before you shave ;)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-36592084831092358882008-01-16T19:45:00.000-06:002008-01-16T19:45:00.000-06:00My friend Lopakalolo is teaching me to cuss, gosh ...My friend Lopakalolo is teaching me to cuss, gosh dang it. He says I got the vo-freaking-cabulary down pretty good, but I gotta work on my timing, the hell.<BR/><BR/>I thought I'd go to the source for cussing lessons, and I opened my bible to where the big J flames the fig tree for not having fruit when he was freaking hungry. Never mind that figs weren't in season goddamn it. The hell. I didn't get much useful information, though. Apparently nobody wrote down or remembered what Jesus said. It would have had to be profanity more than cursing though, because what, is he going to say "I curse you all to heck..." It just isn't the same as a big "GOD damn it..."<BR/><BR/>I always secretly liked that little tantrum though. As a kid I thought Jesus was a little immature, and since I noticed, that made me a little more mature.<BR/><BR/>Speaking of which...my 18-year-old son got home today. He says fuck and fuckin' every other word. The other day he lamented the lack of a decent vocabulary when he's angry. I thought it was pretty good, but to him, the profanity is just an everyday word, so when he's freaking mad, he has nothing to say. The heck.<BR/><BR/>I bet Jesus had that problem. I can see him storming around the temple "you have made my father's house a den of thieves..." and later thinking, "dang I coulda done better..."Soul Levelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16508113421310019590noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-10417286085935755742008-01-16T16:06:00.000-06:002008-01-16T16:06:00.000-06:00you are too dang funny! the things you do with wo...you are too dang funny! the things you do with words!rakhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05341589380773394236noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-52655081023647570402008-01-16T13:04:00.000-06:002008-01-16T13:04:00.000-06:00Sugar, lavender and mint oil. FABU! (And gentle, n...Sugar, lavender and mint oil. FABU! (And gentle, no need for swears, even though swearing is SO much fun!).<BR/><BR/>:)C.https://www.blogger.com/profile/01605972471819914591noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-9481606960824613242008-01-16T11:08:00.000-06:002008-01-16T11:08:00.000-06:00Jocelyn, dear,Why not a little milk and honey from...Jocelyn, dear,<BR/><BR/>Why not a little milk and honey from the Promised Land as a body scrub instead? Throw in some oats and brown sugar and you're all set. <BR/><BR/>But if you insist on the torturous salts, may I suggest a few expletives: (as fast as your tongue can roll)<BR/><BR/>Hijo-de-la-gran-puta, me-cago-en-tu madre... <BR/><BR/>Throw in some ave-marias and you'll feel better. Promise.<BR/><BR/>AugustKatherinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06113815064063684876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-33727825580979065562008-01-16T03:45:00.000-06:002008-01-16T03:45:00.000-06:00We have been watching a LOT of Battlestar Galactic...We have been watching a LOT of Battlestar Galactica around here lately, and in good sci-fi fashion they have their own swears - "Frick" seems to be an approved, all-purpose one and we have taken to using it with relish (pickle relish, obviously). <BR/>I have a salt scrub that does wonders for the face and neck. Too bad that I also have a raw nose from the Winter Cold That Will Not Die, and I only remember when it's slathered and burning.<BR/>I'm with you on that one!<BR/>Frick.MrsGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12850209738701778780noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-59490958670782618082008-01-15T14:20:00.000-06:002008-01-15T14:20:00.000-06:00You had me cringing by the end of your post! I ca...You had me cringing by the end of your post! I can almost imagine the humor in your post but dare not mention it! ;-)<BR/><BR/>Take care!Davehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15371849934851785096noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-47359779136015212582008-01-15T09:11:00.000-06:002008-01-15T09:11:00.000-06:00Wow, you shave your legs in winter? I thought that...Wow, you shave your legs in winter? I thought that was what opaque tights were for.Jazzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14644896022880634803noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-53160738103153474362008-01-15T02:00:00.000-06:002008-01-15T02:00:00.000-06:00Rubbing salt in wounds has never been my best thin...Rubbing salt in wounds has never been my best thing but yes, you do need some shiny new expletives. I would tell you the ones I use in moments of duress but you'd probably never speak to me again. <BR/><BR/>I've been thinking I should come up with some nice euphemisms so I don't offend myself anymore.<BR/><BR/>Aloe helps all. That would be the last step after toweling dry.heartinsanfranciscohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07535397382991383931noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-43713318464663538142008-01-14T23:52:00.000-06:002008-01-14T23:52:00.000-06:00This is exactly why I don't shave my legs. Too pai...This is exactly why I don't shave my legs. Too painful when I use the salts. And I'm not that creative in thinking of non-swear swear words.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02737980462115396236noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-11293042351177398832008-01-14T21:00:00.000-06:002008-01-14T21:00:00.000-06:00Christ-on-a-sidecar! Ouch! I agree that exfoliatin...Christ-on-a-sidecar! Ouch! I agree that exfoliating should come before shaving. Salt in the wound rates a Jesus, Joseph, and Mary!Clairehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10740049258265150141noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-26589956561079703302008-01-14T20:28:00.000-06:002008-01-14T20:28:00.000-06:00ah. talk about parting the red sea, or the dead se...ah. talk about parting the red sea, or the dead sea, or is it dead sea salts?<BR/><BR/>i'm confused now.Girlplustwohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07056576921114387218noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-70940690401401906782008-01-14T15:58:00.000-06:002008-01-14T15:58:00.000-06:00"Mother of Pearl" works around here. My Nick was n..."Mother of Pearl" works around here. <BR/><BR/>My Nick was named Rick and like the name implies he was a real pr***.SQThttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04251030404220909306noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-76871755674673721332008-01-14T15:18:00.000-06:002008-01-14T15:18:00.000-06:00These days, around my house, one can be heard scre...These days, around my house, one can be heard screaming, "SHIRT!" or "FROG!" in place of other, similar-sounding exclamations.<BR/><BR/>Then there's my personal favorite, "SWEET CORN OF CHRIST!". I don't know if Christ ate corn, but the vision of Him wearing plaid and a ball cap, sitting astride the Blessed St. John Deere Tractor makes me smile, and that normally difuses whatever pain/anger/frustration caused me to shout in the first place.kimberhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00619167075054678786noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-42848246213555527492008-01-14T14:09:00.000-06:002008-01-14T14:09:00.000-06:00Sounds like the salt was already damning you inste...Sounds like the salt was already damning you instead of the other way around. <BR/><BR/>Isn't it a wonderful thing: that delay along the nerve that senses the extreme pain and the reaching of the pain signal to the brain, leading to an extra couple of seconds of rubbing the salt into the wound before you realize what you're doing?<BR/><BR/>Bless.Dianahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08273493776473085128noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-231119984826661662008-01-14T13:27:00.000-06:002008-01-14T13:27:00.000-06:00Yes we could do with some more satisfactory explet...Yes we could do with some more satisfactory expletives. My kids use 'barnacles' and 'fishpaste' but somehow they don't quite hit the mark for me. I wonder why?<BR/>CheersAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-61522668644909790642008-01-14T13:25:00.000-06:002008-01-14T13:25:00.000-06:00you should exfoliate before you shave-- it makes t...you should exfoliate before you shave-- it makes the shave a closer one.franniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05563502061531199609noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-78144879069696831282008-01-14T13:07:00.000-06:002008-01-14T13:07:00.000-06:00Perhaps you should add a final step to your routin...Perhaps you should add a final step to your routine. After you shave and scrub with salt, spray some insect repellant on those tender legs. It will make you forget all about the salt.Lisahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18325365353595091840noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-15084855904356300822008-01-14T11:10:00.000-06:002008-01-14T11:10:00.000-06:00Yes, I have been there. Think of it as a purging o...Yes, I have been there. Think of it as a purging of inner rotting epithelialsJeanniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15320507412459242451noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-5299659470061921792008-01-14T10:38:00.000-06:002008-01-14T10:38:00.000-06:00I am so impressed you make your own scrub. A lady ...I am so impressed you make your own scrub. <BR/><BR/>A lady I went to for a pedicure admonished me for shaving before the toe and leg treatment. I thought I was saving her from severe stubble and she was saving me from your fate.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-74615648456112775492008-01-14T10:37:00.000-06:002008-01-14T10:37:00.000-06:00For all your swearing needs, click here. Then cli...For all your swearing needs, click <A HREF="http://www.viz.co.uk/?%2Fprofanisaurus%2Fprofan_index.php%3Ffb%3D1" REL="nofollow">here</A>. Then click on the Profanisaurus link.<BR/><BR/>PussGlamourpusshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01450175254756849062noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-87662518025370795592008-01-14T10:36:00.000-06:002008-01-14T10:36:00.000-06:00Ouch! I always look as if I've decided to die, in...Ouch! I always look as if I've decided to die, in what I like to term, 'the death of a thousand nicks'.<BR/>No salt for me, not while the blood is streaming down my legs in rivulets.<BR/><BR/>(But I've got a great store of 'swears' if you need 'em!)Taihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03501421874989420807noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33559037.post-44285984026222524602008-01-14T09:03:00.000-06:002008-01-14T09:03:00.000-06:00I'm pretty sure that would've warranted a Christ-o...I'm pretty sure that would've warranted a Christ-on-a-Fookin-Crutch!<BR/><BR/>And I agree with the others, salt before razors. This is also a good rule of thumb for the kitchen.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com