Wednesday, June 18, 2008

"Random Headlines from the Newspaper Printed Only in My Brain, Where Circulation Is Down"

Thornless Rose Discovered; Members of Poison Devastated

There's Nothing Dumber Than Owning a Small Horse

Bindi Irwin's Tamagotchi Experiences Painful, Lingering Death


Jury Decides: Tony Danza Was the Boss

Members of Rock Group America Ride Into Desert on Horse Named "Monty"; Unrelenting Rain Follows

Dolly Parton Skydives Naked, Manages Blind Landing
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Sorry for the "filler" post; it's been a particularly packed week, with softball games, kids at camp, friend visiting, gardening, and crazed online students. At this very minute, my ass is doing a weird locked 'n screaming thing--I've been on it so long this morning in front of the computer, grading discussion postings and "reading logs."

Later today, though, I have an ass-ectomy scheduled, so that should alleviate my woe.

11 comments:

lime said...

i'm glad the ass-ectomy is scheduled for thsi afternoon. i shudder to think i could perhaps read a headline about you similar to the one about the lady whose flesh was welded to her toilet because she sat there for 5 years or so.

furiousBall said...

I heard about that rose, it truly was the rock of love

Vanessa said...

I love the small horse headline!

Anonymous said...

Dolly wha? hehe

Anonymous said...

Sounds like someone needs a little time off!

none said...

Funny stuff!

Claire said...

Let us know how the ass-ectomy goes, ok?

Glamourpuss said...

I reckon your president needs one of those operations...

Good luck with the end of term madness.

Puss

Jazz said...

An assectomy. I need one of those.

PS: even your filler posts are hilarious.

paperback reader said...

Man, ass-ectomy sounds all hot at first, but you know it's totally not.

Anonymous said...

No apologies allowed in Blog land. In skimming mode, I appreciate headlines more than you know!

Blog Reader's Eyes Drop, Bounce off Keyboard, and Roll to Floor